support wanted

Twitter users: If you have a spare moment today, please send a message of support to PAIL blogger EndoJourney. She’s had an insanely medicalized journey to pregnancy with her son “MB,” starting with a ruptured ectopic, then severe OHSS during the IVF cycle that gave her a BFP, and she’s been on bed rest for a while now with SCH bleeding, constant contractions and dynamic cervix. She was admitted to the hospital yesterday at 22.5 weeks at 3cm and with a lot of uterine irritability. MB is still doing great– he’s a little fighter baby– but he needs to stay on the inside as long as possible! EJ is very upset and worried about MB, of course, and anyone who’s been on bed rest for any length of time knows that the inactivity and isolation is brutal, so her spirits have been down– please take a minute to send her some kind words and encouragement to hang in there while she waits this out, and any prayers/juju/good vibes are welcome as well.

To rally support on Twitter, please RT the PAILbloggers official support message for EndoJourney.

Thank you! We have such an awesome community here. It’s amazing how much other ALIers can boost each other’s spirits and confidence. You all are the best!

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weekly summary, vol. 17

We have recently welcomed Traathy of Happily Ever After to the PAIL Bloggers team. Traathy has been an angel sent from blog administration heaven! Welcome! 🙂

PAIL Posts This Week:

  • SRB gave her thoughts on the ins and outs of “The JO Room” and touched on what this experience must be like for the men folk. We had a good-natured discussion of “the horrors” in the comments, and many of you linked to your own posts on the subject. Check these out for some touching moments and some hilarity regarding said moments of touching:

Featured Posts:

  • Josey featured the post “She Looks Just Like Her Daddy” from Finding My New Normal which discusses the difficulties in hearing that your child looks just her father when you used an egg donor. This was our first look at donor gametes, and we welcome any thoughts or resources you could send our way!

Book Club:

  • Vol. 3 (Fall 2012) of the PAIL Book Club will be discussing Nurture Shock by Po Bronson and Ashley Merryman. 
  • Sign up TODAY! 
  • Questions and discussion points will be due on October 11.

New to the Blogroll This Week:

  • All Grown Up – Living life after adopting domestically twice. Involved in very open adoption and semi-open adoption with our girls’ first families. (Kids 2+)
  • My (In)fertile Confessions – Life with twins after infertility, treating pcos naturally, motherhood, clean eating. (Babies 1-2 years)
  • The Wild Rumpus (formerly Getting Closer to Fine) has switched to WP. Please update your readers! (Babies under 1)

Stay Connected:

PAIL book club, vol. 3

I suppose it makes sense to open a post about Book Club with this question: How many parenting books do you already have on your shelves?

I went to graduate school for early childhood education (specifically infants and toddlers), so it probably wouldn’t surprise anyone to see a bunch of child development books scattered around my house, although they’re mostly being used as coasters or collecting dust in the back room these days. In my living room, however, are several recent purchases: mostly Dr. Sears and a few twin-specific titles like “Mothering Multiples.” Every single book has met the same fate– I bought them while pregnant, thumbed through them a few times, thought “This isn’t really applicable for me until I have a child who is at least X age,” and then… they were forgotten. Seriously, I took to Twitter for desperate advice when my girls stopped sleeping through the night and completely forgot that I have a whole book about sleep issues not ten feet from me.

The book we will be reading for this installment of the PAIL Book Club is not a typical parenting book. It’s a “throw everything you think you know about parenting out the window” book. And I am pumped as hell to read it.

If you’ve read any Malcolm Gladwell (“The Tipping Point,” “Blink”), Nurture Shock looks to me like it’s another book cut from that mold– looking closely at a variety of social, environmental, and developmental factors in an attempt to pinpoint the reasons behind things children do. I’m curious to see if I finish the book feeling like I’ve got an “in” on some parenting secrets.

This book came on the request of several PAIL bloggers, so we’re hoping that there will be lots of participation and some fun discussions!

If you’d like to participate in the book club, this is how it will work:

1. Fill out the form below to sign up.

2. Pick up a copy of Nurture Shock. Check your local library and reserve your copy today!

3. On October 11th (3 weeks from now) we’ll send around an email to all of the participants asking you to send in a question or discussion topic, anything at all you’d like to talk about with the rest of the book club. You don’t have to send a question, but the more people who do, the more jumping-off points we’ll have to facilitate a discussion.

4. The question and topic list will be posted on October 18th, so you’ll have a month to read the book. Then, write a post about Nurture Shock on your blog – your thoughts, issues you had with the book, new ideas you got, things that surprised you, anything at all. Your post is due at midnight, October 31.

5. Two weeks later, on November 1st, we’ll post the list of blog links and BOOM! We will have some amazing discussions and get to know some new bloggers!

Important dates:

  • ASAP – buy the book and sign up for book club
  • Oct. 11th – submit your questions and/or discussion points
  • Oct. 18th – complete list of questions will posted
  • Oct. 31st – post due to be submitted for the listing
  • Nov. 1st – complete list of participating blogs will be posted on PAIL’s main page

Alright then… get reading!


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news item: “my 20 minutes in fertility hell”

Dick jokes. Coming up with a good one is hard… There! I did it. Ice broken?

I came across this third-hand via some blog hopping that is a little fuzzy now. Warning: For some reason your browser tab will just say “Masturbation –”. But that’s not all this article is about! Only mostly.

Last week, featured (re-blogged? re-posted?) an article by Greg Pollock titled “My 20 minutes in fertility hell” (originally titled “In the JO Room” on his Tumblr). Twenty WHOLE minutes you say? Do GO ON! Eyeroll completed, I make a sour duck face at the subtitle: “When my wife had trouble conceiving, I had to stare down my fears in a room filled with porn DVDs and Hustlers.”  My actual thought was “OMFG. Please don’t be a dick about this, dude.”

[Read more…]

featured post: “She Looks Just Like Her Daddy” by My New Normal

I am the spitting image of my mother. No joke. People see pictures of my Mom at my age, and they think it’s me. My youngest brother is the spitting image of my father. Same thing – you could literally mistake them for each other in pictures.

Because of this, I always thought we had “strong genes” or something (yes, I know this isn’t a real thing, but just work with me here), and I assumed any kid of mine would come out looking like me, especially if we had a girl.

Um, no. My child is 100% her daddy, and as cute as I think my husband is, there are definitely days that it makes me a little sad.

That’s why when I started reading this post by My New Normal (who I have never followed before – I found her while cruising through the PAIL blogroll this week and wasn’t aware of her TTC story), I was figuring it was your typical post about your kid looking nothing like you and kind of wishing s/he did. Then I got to this line…

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