To Mom or Not to Mom, Day 2: Trading Places

It’s Day 2 of The Infertility Voice and Silent Sorority‘s 5-Day Open Salon “To Mom or Not to Mom: Infertility, Motherhood and the Silent Sorority.” Today’s topic is Trading Places.

Today, Keiko and Pamela imagined their lives in alternate universes where they each might have been in a very different place in their infertility and parenting journeys: Keiko with a failed DEIVF cycle and a decision to no longer pursue parenting, and Pamela as a mother.

Reading these posts today, I wonder– could I picture myself with a very different parenting journey? If my IUI with injectables had failed, the doctors said we could move right on to IVF. if the IVF had failed– would we have considered adoption? More IVF? Could we have ever made the decision to live full and happy lives without children?

Today, examine some of the realities that you could have experienced if things had happened differently in your life.


What would it be like for you to have made the decision not to parent?

What would it have taken for you to come to that place?

How do you think you would feel about parenting if you had never experienced infertility or loss?

What other aspects of your parenting journey could you see playing out differently in an alternate universe?

How has the specific path to parenting that you have taken changed who you are as a person (or do you feel it hasn’t)?


If you have posted about this topic before, or if you are inspired to talk about it now, please link us to your post in the comments below, or simply post a comment and share your thoughts with us.

As always, we encourage you to go directly to The Infertility Voice and Silent Sorority to read Keiko and Pamela’s “To Mom or Not to Mom, Day 2” posts!

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