november 2013 – monthly theme post listing – how long is your leash?

This month’s theme post topic was all about parenting, independent play, and leash lengths — and whether or not people thought their ALI backgrounds affected how they’ve ultimately parented. There weren’t a lot of submissions, but the ones you’ll see below are quality over quantity. 🙂 Enjoy!

Suggested Writing Prompts

  • Does your ALI background make you feel like you need to spend more time being exclusively focused on your child?
  • Are you more “hands off” as a parent than you thought you’d be? More of a “helicopter parent?” Are you happy with the type of parent you’ve turned out to be?
  • Does your child do well with independent play? If so, did you have to consciously encourage this or did it just happen?
  • If your child doesn’t do much independent play, do you simply focus more on group learning and activities?
  • Does the length of your “leash” change depending upon if you’re at home or in public (e.g. at the park)?

Contributing PAIL Bloggers

If you are still writing your post, or these posts inspire you, link up in the comments. Additional posts will be added through the next few days, so check back in to see if any new posts pop up, and feel free to leave some general comments on the topic below.

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reminder – november 2013 monthly theme

As moderator of this topic, I have not yet gotten a chance to write my own post, and though I’ve gotten a few submissions, I’d love to think that a few of you are like me and simply procrastinated on writing this month but still intend to do so. I’d love to hear from more of you! I’m going to make the executive decision to extend the deadline for this month’s posts to this Friday night. That gives you 2 1/2 days to get your own thoughts written out & submitted to PAIL. I’ll get the post of submissions up by Saturday the 30th — still technically in November. 🙂 I can’t wait to hear from you!

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Have you written your post for November’s Monthly Theme yet?

How long is your leash?

november 2013 monthly theme – how long is your leash?

Last year a post came out that criticized Moms for being on their cell phones instead of continuously interacting with their children. There were also a ton of interesting rebuttal posts written. Around that time, one of the PAIL Blogroll members sent us an email that said this:

I really like this post I randomly bumped into today. I’ve found that when I don’t give into the kid’s burning desire for my full attention all the time, she does a great job at playing alone and being imaginative. I think it’s good for her, independent play.

I think this is a balance that we all struggle with as parents. Some parents value independent play more than others, some kids are just inherently wired to be more content playing alone, and some people don’t give a whit if their kid can play alone and would prefer to be interacting with and stimulating their child than encouraging solo play. So our question this month is this:

How do you decide how much independent play is best for your child, and how long of a leash do you give them to do that?

Suggested Writing Prompts

  • Does your ALI background make you feel like you need to spend more time being exclusively focused on your child?
  • Are you more “hands off” as a parent than you thought you’d be? More of a “helicopter parent?” Are you happy with the type of parent you’ve turned out to be?
  • Does your child do well with independent play? If so, did you have to consciously encourage this or did it just happen?
  • If your child doesn’t do much independent play, do you simply focus more on group learning and activities?
  • Does the length of your “leash” change depending upon if you’re at home or in public (e.g. at the park)?

As always, these questions are just a guide. Please feel free to write anything and everything you would like to on this topic in whichever way suits you best. If you have previously written on this topic, feel free to link away in your post, or submit any previous post on the topic as you see fit. And of course, if you do not have a blog of your own, we are happy to hear your thoughts in the comments and will link to your comment in the full post list for all to read.

Entries for this month’s theme are due Tuesday November 26th at midnight, EST.
The full list of links will go live on Thursday, November 28th (US Thanksgiving Day).

Please submit your posts using this form:

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monthly blogroll member update (october)

Hi PAIL Bloggers – it’s time for our monthly update of who is new to the PAIL Blogroll!

Please take a minute to click through the list of our newest blogroll members and find your new favorite blogger. 🙂

  • This Foxy Mama – Just a regular gal, married to the love of my life, raising the family I waited so long to have (born December 2012)
  • Kate @ Infertile First Mom – Birthmother and former adoption professional battles secondary IF (DOR), and finally gets her miracle pregnancy! (born February 2013)
  • Life and Love in the Petri Dish – Six miscarriages, seven IVFs, then finally 1 miracle little girl. Balancing life as a psychologist and new mom. (born October 2012)
  • MissConception – Parenting a little rainbow baby boy after 4 years of infertility and the loss of 20 week boy/girl twins in 2011. (born December 2012)
  • The M House – parenting after loss, domestic adoption (born December 2012)
  • For This Child I Prayed – Parenting two kids under two after battling infertility for years. (born February 2012)
  • FoolishSageWisdom – Mother to 4-year-old, currently expecting after 2 losses on parenting, pregnancy, and keys to the universe. (due March 2014)

We know it’s been quiet around here as we have adjusted to going back to our roots and focusing more on being a blogroll and doing the Monthly Theme Posts. Some day we may start up with more weekly posting again, but in the meantime, please make sure you’re utilizing our blogroll to find other PAIL bloggers to connect with and our Resources page for all questions pertaining to pregnancy, parenting, and of course, fertility.

Also, are you interested in running a book club through PAIL? If so, please shoot us an email and let us know what book you’re interested in featuring and what timeline works best for you.

As always, thank you for being YOU and for participating in this space! We all can use the support on this unique journey of being pregnant and/or parenting after our adoption, loss, and infertility experiences.

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