questions from the blogroll: books to a good home!

Hey folks!

The other day AL from Mellow in the Midwest mentioned that she had some books about infertility, loss, and adoption to give away. She would love these books to be passed on to a good home in our community. Here is what is up for grabs:

If you are interested in any of these, please contact AL at mellowblogger (at) gmail (dot) com to make arrangements.


If you are struggling with something or have something to share, bring us your questions – the blogroll is there to help! Submit here! Check out our resources (which would we love to keep building with your help)!


Share. Visit. Read. Comment. Support.

book club: Simplicity Parenting discussion questions list

It’s time to start our discussion of Simplicity Parenting. Below you’ll find the list of questions those of you participating in this round of the PAIL book club have submitted.

Also, even if you haven’t signed up yet, there is still time to join in! Posts reviewing the book are not due until February 28th, so just click here if you want to get the details and sign up!

Here are the discussion questions that were submitted. They are meant to help you think more in-depth about the book, but feel free to write on any aspect of the book at all.

  • What is your “vision” for your family?
  • How do you think your life circumstances are uniquely suited/not suited to Payne’s message?
  • What do you all think would be the hardest things for you to change to simplify your life according to Payne’s suggestions?
  • Did anything in the book resonate particularly strongly with you?
  • How do you feel about Payne’s proposed ban on “adult topics” with
    kids? In your family, what do you intend to discuss with or keep from
    your kids?
  • What do you think about Payne’s theory of children having “Cumulative Stress Disorder?” Have you seen examples of it in real life?

Remember, posts are due February 27th and February 28th the complete list of participating blogs will be posted on PAIL’s main page!

news item: personhood and A.R.T.

A little over two years ago my husband and I started the IVF (in vitro fertilization) process. We met with the doctor beforehand and discussed how many embryos we would transfer, and what our options would be for any leftover embryos. Our options for leftover embryos were to a) freeze them, b) donate them to research c) donate them to other couples d) do nothing, allow them to follow the natural course of an embryo in a petri dish, they don’t survive.

That decision, one we have kept private, was very hard for us, as I imagine it is for every couple who goes through IVF. The conversations my husband and I had about this issue though, those conversations were vital – and relationship building – for us. We talked about our faith, our finances, our personal feelings, and our gut instincts on what we felt we wanted to do with any leftover embryos.

There are currently conversations being held in state legislatures of the United States that would seek to make the conversations my husband and I had null. Several state governments in America are seeking to pass “personhood initiatives” which would give full legal rights to embryos from the moment of fertilization and place other restrictions on A.R.T.(Assisted Reproductive Technology) procedures. If passed, depending on the state you lived in, would determine whether you had the right to have that conversation my husband and I had, or even if you could pursue IVF.

This subject is a highly charged one. It is entrenched in the greater debate of abortion in the United States, yet has ramifications for couples seeking A.R.T., couples seeking to preserve fertility due to cancer treatments, couples needing to use egg, sperm, embryo donors, and/or gestational carriers. According to

“Personhood initiatives are one of the most dangerous threats aimed at public access to fertility and perinatal care, and would stand to severely hinder our ability to treat infertility with most assisted reproductive technologies.”

Personhood initiatives could limit the amount of eggs a doctor could retrieve for an IVF attempt, making those attempts much less likely to succeed and eliminating the possibility of freezing any embryos for future attempts. They could also require couples to freeze all viable embryos indefinitely, incurring years of preservation charges.

This issue is complicated. This is issue is important. There are several articles covering this issue and I am listing a few of them here. We hope you’ll read and comment and let us know what you think!

Personhood initiative articles:

Fertility Lab Insider

Resolve, the American National Infertility Association list of articles on personhood laws

CNN, “Could ‘personhood’ bills outlaw IVF?”


What do you think about these ‘personhood’ initiatives and their possible impact on couples seeking A.R.T.?

If you live outside of the United States does your country/province/state have laws like this or seeking to pass laws like this?

If laws like this were passed, would it affect your future family planning?


2013 – here we come!

In case you missed it, 2012 was a big year for PAIL! 🙂 The original inception of the idea of PAIL came about last February, and by the time it came home to this space just three months later, there were already over 200 people on the blogroll. After just seven months in our own domain, there are now over 250 of you, and we just want to say thanks to everyone who made the choice to join this space, contribute to the discussions, and be a part of a great community of people who are parenting through their journeys of adoption, infertility, and loss. It just goes to show you how much can change in one year.

We here at PAIL hope that 2013 brings lots of joy and happiness to you and your family, and we are wondering…

What are you hoping to accomplish in your family building  / health / healing journey in the next year?

questions from the blogroll: “sour milk/nasty formula triple whammy!”

This week we got an email from a reader looking for feeding advice for her daughter. While we have gathered some resources on eating/feeding, we thought “Who better than the blogroll to go to for advice?” So here we are folks – can you help?

The (Once) Bunless Oven wrote to us with this question:

Hi girls!

I hope you can help me – I’m currently struggling with the triple whammy of a baby with a dairy/soy allergy, breastmilk that is souring on storing (fresh or frozen) and an allergen-friendly formula that my little girl won’t drink. Eeek!!

I posted about this the other day and would *really* appreciate the advice and support of the awesome PAIL community. I’m sure there are women out there who’ve struggled with a situation like this. I’d love to hear from them.

Thanks! xx

What say you? Any words of advice? Have you written about this previously? Do you know of any resources that could help a mama out?

Please head over with any helpful advice! We will leave comments open here too for sharing of stories and resources as we are sure other families are (or  have) struggled with this as well. Thanks for sharing!


If you are struggling with something, bring us your questions – the blogroll is there to help! Submit here! Check out our resources (which would we love to keep building with your help)!

%d bloggers like this: